What's YOUR holiday policy?

I have a confession to make. I've already started listening to Christmas music. And I'm not ashamed of it. In all fairness, weeks ago I walked into a store and was greeted by this:

Ok. So maybe my photography isn't going to win any state fair, but I was trying to remain incognito. You know, where you pretend like you're just texting... Anyway, my policy is normally November first or the first snow (whichever comes first), but I was thinking about the great music I was going to listen to in a few short days and I just couldn't wait. Now there's no turning back. I don't really know what the protocol in Germany is. I should ask. I don't think they're as finicky as Americans. But most people in the US follow the "After Thanksgiving" or maybe "after Halloween". They normally have some argument about skipping holidays. I've got news for you. Germany doesn't officially celebrate either one of those holidays (along with most other countries). Ha. You are invalidated. But for those of you bah humbugs out there here's a Thanksgiving song for the meantime (you can come back to it on Thursday if you ABSOLUTELY MUST).

At least Josh understands the season. And that season should be year-round.

I'm not sayin'; I'm just sayin'.

I wanna know about the strangest lightning

One thing that separates the linguistic capabilities of humans apart from other animals is the instinctive attempt to separate series of sounds into words, whether we comprehend them or not. That being said, we try to pick out sounds that we recognize as words.

Throughout my stay in Germany I have heard the songs of "Tangled" more times in German than I can count (granted math really isn't my thing). For months I've thought to myself "How strange. Why is he saying 'I'll decide' in the midst of this German?" I knew that couldn't possibly be what he was saying, but I couldn't help but hear it. Finally, a couple of days ago, I exclaimed, "ALL DIE ZEIT! Is THAT what he's saying?!" I can't express to you the relief which washed over me. I've slept much better ever since. Granted, this isn't just a cross-language issue. I also thought the Phil Collins song from "Tarzan" said, "I wanna know. Can you show me? I wanna know about the strangest lightning." Come on. Don't pretend that you've never misheard lyrics.

I'm not sayin'; I'm just sayin'.

Italian-American Pizza

A "must" while I was in Italy was, of course, to eat pizza. Obviously that is slightly problematic for me, but we found a restaurant that was accommodating. I noticed "American Pizza" on the menu. I read what that entailed--French Fries. Interesting. I can honestly say I had never eaten a pizza topped with fries. I was curious but, instead went with something more reliable. Or so I thought. I ordered sausage and onions. Simple. When I got my plate it was...hotdogs. If I'd read the menu in German I might have recognized the word as "little sausages" and realized exactly what I would be getting. Sausages. Not sausage. Silly American.

I decided to complete the foible by adding a fry to it to experience real American Pizza and viola! The complete American experience. In Italy.

I'm not sayin'; I'm just sayin'.

Nose Wings

Common Sense Caution

As I was brushing my teeth, the back of a hair product on my shelf caught my eye. It said:

Common Sense Caution

For external use only. Avoid contact with eyes. If contact occurs, flush eyes thoroughly with cool water. If adverse reaction occurs, discontinue use and call a physician.

Keep out of reach of children

For external use only... I think they lie.  I'm sure that if I ate this stuff my hair would stay wherever I simply willed it to be.

Avoid contact with eyes... I thought it would make my contacts stay in place too (No I don't wear contacts). Or perhaps for those pesky eye follicles that always frizz on me.

Discontinue use... I once heard that the definition of insanity was trying the same thing over and over and expecting different results. That's all I'm going to say on that.

Call a physician... Don't tell me what to do! But good thing there have been enough lawsuits along these lines that, just in case I'm unsure what to do when suffering from physical ailments, a beauty product tube will remind me. I wonder if the people reading the tube are the ones who need the reminder? What kind of person does it make me for reading it? Hmm...

Bottom line. Actually top line. I can think of no better header for this warning label. So thank you, company from which I bought my hair product. I appreciate your sass. Although you were overpriced. Apparently I was paying extra for character.

I'm not sayin'; I'm just sayin'.

Soundtrack to My Life

Ok. Prepare yourself for a multi-media presentation and a fair bit of nerdiness. Click play on the following link and then continue reading.

One of the best choices of my life was whipping out my old ipod nano for the long(est roadtrip of my life) down to Sardinia. I had forgotten how much music I had on there that wasn't on my phone--particularly in the soundtrack genre. I plugged in and drifted off for the first half of the drive (thanks to some German version of Dramamine). When I woke up it was dark outside and we had reached the Swiss Alps. This song was playing, and I looked out the window and watched the shadowy outlines of the mountains surrounding me. I looked down into a valley and it was full of lights. You might say that they were just normal city lights, but I'm pretty sure it was actually the lit-up trees of an elf community. I could be wrong, but I don't think so. I thought to myself: how cool is my life? Hello? Sigh. I'm pretty much a member of the Fellowship. More or less. You may now either finish listening to the song and visualizing (or dancing, or meditating or whatever) or stop it. But before you read any more start the next link.

The road went ever on and on, and just as this song began to greet my ears we rounded a corner and found Rohan. A ways up the mountain was a lone structure. It was an old castley building with lights pointed on it so that it stood out burning white against the black mountain background as its red flag waved proudly from where there should have been a roof, but I don't know that there is anymore. Who says life isn't as good as a movie? I manage to fit in probably every genre at some point or another, and I even have my own soundtrack.

I'm not sayin'; I'm just sayin'.